ox populi

so i was at a party over the weekend and i met this dude who, upon being introduced to me said, "hey, happy new year!"

considering it was january 24, what do you think he meant?

(a) "happy chinese new year!" since january 26 is chinese new year and obvs i'm chinese?
(b) "happy lunar new year!" since he knew koreans also celebrate lunar new year and he can tell koreans and chinese apart?
(c) "happy new year!" since that's what he says to everyone during the month of january regardless of race?

convenient stereotypes for the new year

i loathe (but maybe love to hate) modern love, the most insipid addition to sunday styles, of which my college idol once said, "what is the point of that section? seems like anyone with a prada bag can get in it nowadays".

anyway, i usually try to ignore modern love but the premise of this week's column was irresistible: a divorced 46-year-old woman decides to marry her friend's brother. sounds boring and predictable, right? joke's on you - the friend and brother are chinese, and the latter lives in china. having never met the brother, the intrepid divorcee flies to china, says yes to the man's halting proposal, "do you want to marry?" and brings him back to albany, new york.

this discomfiting column appears to be an exploration of the old cliche, "all chinese people are bad drivers". and guess what, it's true! not only that, they speak poor english, albeit in an adorable and semi-exotic fashion (His voice was balm to my nerves, and the monthly rice-paper letters were always from “the brootom” of his heart) and all white people who travel to asia feel like scarlett johansson in my least favorite movie ever (describing the beijing airport: This was unlike an American crowd, where you feel harried, even accosted. There, I sailed comfortably through a sea of introverts.).

ick. i just thought of my first new year's resolution: stop reading modern love.

for the awkward moments of our lives...part 2

last week a chinese colleague came by my office and asked me, "so are you celebrating the lunar new year?" i stared at her blankly and replied, "oh, i'm not chinese." she seemed a bit taken aback by my response and said, "oh, ok. i just thought you might because many of my korean friends celebrate it..."

a few days later i was on the phone with my dad:
him: did you do anything special with your sister (who(m?) i'd been visiting) for the new year?
me: since when did we celebrate chinese new year?
him: it is not chinese! how have we raised our kids that two of you get together and neither thinks to do anything for the new year?