what the fuck is david brooks yapping about - part 5 (?)

in this part 5 (?) of what appears to be an infinite-part series, i again examine the latest and greatest david brooks column in the new york times and ask the question we've all been wondering: what the fuck is david brooks yapping about?

i knew today's david brooks column was going to be awesome as soon as i read the headline: lord of the memes. holy shit guys, TWO references in one pun-LARIOUS title! it also began with my favorite david brooks literary device, the Q&A. who's supposed to be kierkegaard, you daavid brøoks?

anyway, i didn't really read this shit in depth, but here are some choice quotes:

But on or about June 29, 2007, human character changed. That, of course, was the release date of the first iPhone.

(In this era, MySpace is the new leisure suit and an AOL e-mail address is a scarlet letter of techno-shame.)

Maximum status goes to the Gladwellian heroes who occupy the convergence points of the Internet infosystem — Web sites like Pitchfork for music, Gizmodo for gadgets, Bookforum for ideas, etc.

those are NOT WORDS. i know this is his attempt at humor or something, but seriously, who is this guy's intended audience?? is anyone laughing?

Known Knowns, Known Unknowns, Unknown Unknowns

You know, what's weird? Those moments in life when you discover something that's common knowledge is unknown to you. Maybe, you've been pronouncing the word "oeuvre" or "Penelope" wrong, maybe you thought the Maldives are in the Mediterranean, maybe (like me) you thought Jennifer Lopez and A.C. Slater (pictured) are siblings in real life. Who knows, but the point is no one's ever corrected you. This happened to Jon Stewart a few weeks ago when he said "sang-gween" instead of "sang-gwin," and his guest, Jerry Seinfeld called him on it. The look on Stewart's face was classic: sheepish meets sarcastic, in keeping with his typical poses, but beneath the surface you could tell he was embarrassed. But this kind of thing happens to everyone. In fact I have a friend who's about the smartest person I know, and she thought I was mainlining Jack Daniels when I said so and so was making money hand over fist.

Anyway, I myself just now had one of these moments. Apparently, I have gone my whole life writing and saying "fin de siecle" for "piece de resistance." Bill Safire is going to be so disappointed in me. (Of course, he would never use "so" incorrectly as I just did.)