sports break

in honor of baseball hothead lou piniella's retirement, i wanted to post his infamous fight with rob dibble. alas, you really cannot find that video online! believe me, i tried. for at least 5 minutes. yeah, i know that page says "watch this video." well, guess what, you can't. you'll get a weather report instead.

anyway, hope that tiny photo suffices. so long, lou!

ps. here is a good description, if you care:

The Occasion: Bullnecked psycho Rob Dibble didn't care for being taken out of a 1992 game for another pitcher, especially since he thought manager Lou Piniella had been badmouthing him to the media. So he decided to squawk about it in the locker room.

The Meltdown: Unfortunately for Dibble, Piniella has never been a cerebral Joe Maddon type of manager. Instead, he waded in for a fight that degenerated into a wrestling match.

The Fallout: While the incident quickly blew over, Piniella's crack of "I'd treat you like a man, but you don't want to be treated like a man!" helped ensure a lifetime of embarrassment for everyone involved.

pants on the ground

someone over the weekend told me that this blog is a part of her google reader list. whaaa?? i was so seriously honored. thanks, yo.

anyway, this may cause you to remove us from your google reader feed, but i'm willing to take the chance.

huffingtonpost or someone else posted a rather puzzling video of brett favre shouting "pants on the ground" in the locker room whilst slapping his fellow players' butts. yes, can it get any more homoerotic? perhaps if they were wrestling.



anyway, so i had no idea what this "pants on the ground" business was and, of course, it's from american idol. so here you go, google readers, a stirring rendition of "pants on the ground," courtesy of civil rights activist (i kid you not--it was a part of some MLK celebration on the view today) Larry Platt.

Don't Sass Me, Fuckstick

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

How old do you think Wilford Brimley is? Seriously ask yourself. I've been reviewing documents to see if they're responsive to our the-law-firm-at-which-I-work's protective order while thinking about guzzling bottles of white-out from the supply room and ending it all. Well, not really. I get through these kinds of tasks with the aid of Hulu, Netflix's Watch Instantly function, and This American Life podcasts. Today, I've been catching up on a backlog of Colbert Report episodes, and he just now mentioned Wilford Brimley -- in the present tense. And I thought didn't Wilford Brimley die years ago? I looked him up on the Wikipedia, and not only is he very much alive, he's only 73. While that's not young per se, I would've put him in his late 80's, easy.

But it turns out he was only 59 when The Firm came out -- which co-starred Gene Hackman, who is almost 5 years older than him - and 51 when Cocoon came out -- which co-starred Don Ameche and Hume Cronyn, both of whom, were they alive today, would be about 100. Now, I didn't watch Cocoon, but wasn't Wilford Brimley supposed to be old as shit like those guys in the movie? Hasn't he looked old as shit ever since we were kids and Quaker Oats was the right thing to do? I think there's a really compelling argument against mustaches and oatmeal to be made here.

hockeytown

so someone admonished me for not properly mourning anna nicole smith's death. seriously? c'mon. clearly i'm not alone in my lack of respect (also see here).

now to the title of this post. i know all kinds of random trivia about pre-mid-90s sports (did you know that pedro martinez started with the montreal expos?), but admittedly, my sports knowledge is pretty antiquated. i stopped caring about sports at around 1994, when the vancouver canucks lost the stanley cup finals to the (gag) new york rangers in seven games. it shattered me. i think due to this trauma, i rarely read the sports pages.

i randomly turned to the nyt sports section the other day and saw this article. despite the fact that the names leetch, graves, messier and richter make me throw up a little in my mouth, you gotta appreciate a goalie who decided to do this post-retirement:

Richter has navigated his transition by enrolling at Yale and working toward a degree in ethics, politics and economics; he will finish either this year or next. He works with Yale’s goalies as a volunteer assistant and also helps coach his 6-year-old son’s hockey team. He and his wife, Veronica, have two other sons, ages 4 and 2.

Being forced to retire left Richter feeling as if he had been robbed of the end of his career. But he said Yale had given him structure, a goal and time to spend with his family. He has not decided on his next career, he said, but he has invested time with the environmental group Riverkeeper and is interested in nonprofit organizations and public policy.

damn, girl.