Psycho T Smells What Barack's Got Cooking

So much can be gleaned from the picture above--most important, the press corps does seem to harbor an indefatigable love of America's Sweetheart and secret Muslim-in-Chief, Barack Obama. According to the New York Times, during Obama's pick-up game against the Tar Heels this morning he didn't manage to score, and in the picture above we see him, having driven through the lane (past what looks like a lazing Danny Green, who's got to be worried about his draft stock now, I'm thinking), jump just a few feet from the basket to shoot, as National Player of the Year Tyler Hansbrough's outstretched arms greet him. Now, we can assume that Hansbrough--although he is not known for his blocking skills--probably rejected the shit out of Obama in the moment immediately after this shot was taken. I mean we know for a fact that he didn't score. And in the subsequent moment, after the likely vicious block, surely Obama's crumpled frame fell to the floor as he gasped for air through his charred lungs, and Psycho T probably huffed and puffed over him--white middle class voter that he is. Where are these photographs that I have described? Why were they not taken? Why do we see Obama only in a state of beatific, lane-slashing glory, his eyes a-gleam with hope. Why do we not see the aftermath? Why does the media go to such lengths to preserve this man's image? Also, sidenote: how much does Psycho T hate Obama? Apparently, they were supposed to be playing on the same team.

None of this would have happened, had Obama's bodyman (think Charlie from The West Wing) and member of Duke's 2001 national championship team, Reggie Love, taken Obama and his pick-up game to Cameron, home of the elitist Duke Blue Devils--although Krzyzewski might have yelled at him about capital gains taxes or something.