Music Video of the Day: Bush's Brain Edition

Having lost the popular vote in 2000, having lost global goodwill post-September 11th, having lost his credibility, self-respect, and sense of purpose in the intervening years, it's fitting, it's inevitable, that today the President actually and officially lost his mind. Bush's Brain has come to realize that while it was fun to paint the blank canvas of his pretend candidate, and then lie and cajole his way into the White House, governing itself isn't nearly as much fun. So, as Turd Blossom returns to the warm Texas soil, I dedicate the video above to our President.

Coldplay, Not for the Streets or Anywhere Else

Everyone has their opinions about celebrity couples. I for one have vaguely positive feelings for Brad and Angelina--despite the inevitable backlash--but I can't stand Gwyneth and her husband: an offensive human assemblage of inanity. So, for me it's no surprise when otherwise sober, peace-loving hippies attack off-duty cops unwinding to the sounds of their own Coldplay karaoke.

iTurdBlossom

I have maybe two ambitions in life: to be a Youtube-approved MC and to own an iPhone. How can I make sense of the world when Karl Rove has beaten me to the punch on both counts? How can you?

fancy feast

JESUS. look at that thing. i am getting depressed just looking at that photo. what are these owners doing to these poor animals? i'm not much of an animal lover: i like meat, i somewhat like leather and i sometimes think all those animal rights groups are out of their mind for not prioritizing the alleviation of human suffering, but this is just cruel.

but doesn't this remind you of that article about how your fatty friends are also making you fat? i'd like to see a photo of this cat's owner. but then again, how come jon arbuckle was so thin?

Forever, ever? Forever, ever?

So, okay, the hiatus has been much longer than I'd intended, but for real, now, I'm back. Well, at least until Pockets and I take the most indirect cross-country trip ever in a couple of weeks, but I'm sure there're going to be internet cafes off I-10 in West Texas and stories galore to share.

I'm on the other side of (the Bar Exam and) the Wedding--major life event(s), for sure--and the comedown has been really strange. Our major passtime now is trying to laugh at all the drama that such an intense gathering of far-flung family gives rise to. But on Sunday, Pockets and I were in the hotel room, decompressing. We opened up the three or four gifts that some people insisted on actually bringing to the wedding, and then we saw it: the most beautiful crystal rose (laid on an accompanying mirror) ever regifted. I share it with you now.

there ain't no nuthin' we can't love each other through...

god i miss family ties.

i know, the photo is really dark. you can't really tell who's in it. why didn't i have my flash on? this is the kind of shit that i think about when i get up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. but i assure you, i was elated to see everyone and the wedding was a blast.

in an unusual bout of sentimentality, this marks the end of my post. everyone, i'm so glad we had a chance to catch up and share some laughs (some courtesy of me, of course). c4ts, sugarpockets, i can't even express how happy i am for both of you. hope you now have a chance to relax.

and blog.

Return to Glory

So, I'm back online. This past week I've been out west, doing all the necessary legwork as Interweb Detritus prepares to open its shiny new Bay Area headquarters. Ann Arbor was good enough to sustain us in the early days, but now that we've blown up, E and I are taking this thing bicoastal. She'll continue to manage the New York City wing of the operation, of course.

Anyway, it's going to be a week or so more before I get back to full operational mode, but in the meantime enjoy the above clip, which hails from my homeland, or at least my birthplace: It's of Filipino prisoners reenacting "Thriller" as part of a dance rehabilitation program, and it's totally mesmerizing.

step to the wu

c4ts, now that you have some free time on your hands, how's about you enter this contest? oh wait, pc-only. too badz. but the rest of you, go for it. and please, diversify your bonds.

pants off dance off

i have somehow managed to refrain from blogging about this ridonculous lawsuit. i mean, where to begin? the plaintiff is a judge, for chrissake. have some dignity, please. not to dwell on the obvious, but do some people really have this much time on their hands or are they deranged enough to believe this type of a claim is meritorious? and the judge presiding over this case - how can she (he?) let this go on for two years?? i don't remember much from law school, but common sense tells me roy pearson should be disbarred or disciplined at the least.

anyway, some people in dc took a brief respite from their megalomania to attend a benefit to raise money for the chungs, whose legal fees are somewhere above $83,000. [Ed note: read the comments on that post. some real gems out there.] i went to their fundraising website and realized omg, daniel dae kim donated at least $250! um afterelton, it's time to move him up your list.

speaking of pants, i don't know if anyone's noticed this story, but this shit is just a disaster.

secret asian man

i've always harbored an extreme, borderline irrational hatred of the show "friends." okay fine, so it's kind of like hating racism or cloudy days, and i'm not exactly going out on a limb here by despising this sad excuse for entertainment (yes yes, how is rachel affording that huge-ass soho loft on her coffee shop waitress salary? how can joey afford anything? are there really no minorities in nyc aside from superhot women who date greg kinnear? and why does the fact that joey's favorite food is "sandwiches" make me simultaneously laugh and hate myself for finding it funny?). everyone knows i love television and would never sully it without due cause.

anyway, steve park is in a new movie. i'd totally forgotten about this guy. apparently he married the white woman from in living color (who i always confused with george stephanopolous's wife). i also had no idea about this vitriol he directed at that nadir of television, friends, which he describes as follows: "Working with the people involved with this show was an extremely painful experience for me. A disturbing lack in generosity of spirit and basic human courtesy, in addition to a racial incident on the set, has forced me to speak out."

but didn't grey's anatomy teach us that people of all races can get along so long as nobody is gay?

doin' it all for my baby

from stereogum: is it christmas in july? i think so.

i loved that huey lewis & the news behind the music. the dude went to like andover or something (is there something in the rarefied waters over there? bc apparently an andover degree also helps you play some mean hoops) and after graduating from high school his dad gave him a thousand bucks and told him to go to europe instead of going to college. what?! these parents surely were not korean.

anyway, huey and the news are wholesome, healthy and hip to be square. not to mention they are prominently featured in one of the greatest 80s movies of all time starring one of the greatest canadians of all time. oh, and they also made one of the best videos. ever.

fore!

[Ed note: c4ts and sugarpockets are, um, preoccupied for the next few days. please pray for them and this blog.]

you can doooo eeet

c4ts, collin, sugarpockets, booksie and all others who are facing the you-know-what, best of luck. bela and the rest of the former soviet bloc are rooting for you

We all gonna die...

So, who gets nuked first today? Iran's the odds-on favorite--no doubt--but I hear Cheney has it in for Luxembourg.

Also, cousin-defiling, abortionist, cross-dressing, terrorism-fetishizing, firefighter-hating, Iraq-Study-Group-avoiding, coke-dealer-hiring squeegee-eradicator/absentee-dad-in-chief is making it a little too easy on me: Now, he wants to carpet bomb my grandmama's house. Wait, scratch that; he thinks we already are.

what are these bears doing?

is this a bidet?

what about the one lying down? it's making me cross all kinds of davidson lines.

please, enlighten me.

also, did anyone else read david denby's commentary on the state of romantic comedies? i didn't realize knocked up was ripe for such exegesis.

mea culpa

i recently chastized my friend heidi for wanting to clerk for an "indie rock" judge (y'know, watches deadwood and stuff). but this makes me want to watch network news some more. what more can you ask for? the man is such a dreamboat. he's like 100 ft tall, has all of his original hair, is simultaneously self-possessed and self-effacing. well, so he mystic tans a little. what do you want? he's a news anchor, not a research lab assistant. all in all, swoon.

yeah, you can take chris botti and shove it up your low ratings, katie couric. you too, moon vest.