Showing posts with label snaggletoothed freakshow. Show all posts
Showing posts with label snaggletoothed freakshow. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

nerd fantasies do come true aka what the fuck is david brooks yapping about part ??

in this part 6? 7? of what appears to be an infinite-part series, i again eric foner examines the latest and greatest david brooks column in the new york times and asks the question we've all been wondering: what the fuck is david brooks yapping about? 

i watched lincoln over the holiday weekend.  i was impressed by the narrative arc that kushner et al created over a legislative vote.  yeah, i know: if you can't create suspense and drama out of the abolishment of slavery and the civil war, then what hope is there for storytelling?  still, it actually focused on the legislative process, which i guess i especially appreciated given my line of work.  both tommy lee jones and james spader were highly entertaining.  but you know, i felt squeamish over all that rah rah america is great patriotism permeating the film.  i mean, yes, the thirteenth amendment was a monumental achievement, but c'mon, y'all had slavery to begin with.  let's not get too high on ourselves here.

throughout the movie i wondered what eric foner thought of this whole business.  i haven't read his lincoln book, but i remember him disparaging doris kearns goodwin's thesis in team of rivals quite a bit during his book tour.

even though nobody asked for it, over the weekend, david brooks threw in his pointless two cents about how lincoln the film reminds us of how great politics could be blahblahbla.  i kind of skimmed it, rolled my eyes, and moved on.

but what do i see here?  eric foner's letter to the editor of the times was published today--he puts brooks and his banal, insipid op-ed in their place by pointing out that its premise is based flawed history, which he then explains in his usual concise, economical prose.  i seriously have been dreaming about enlisting an authoritative voice against brooks--and here it is! 

David Brooks praises the new movie “Lincoln” for illuminating “the nobility of politics” and, he hopes, inspiring Americans to reconsider their low regard for politicians. The film depicts Abraham Lincoln’s arm-twisting and political maneuvering in January 1865 to secure approval of the 13th Amendment, which, when ratified by three-quarters of the states, abolished slavery throughout the nation. 

This was indeed an important moment in political history. But Mr. Brooks, and the film, offer a severely truncated view. Emancipation — like all far-reaching political change — resulted from events at all levels of society, including the efforts of social movements to change public sentiment and of slaves themselves to acquire freedom.

The 13th Amendment originated not with Lincoln but with a petition campaign early in 1864 organized by the Women’s National Loyal League, an organization of abolitionist feminists headed by Susan B. Anthony and Elizabeth Cady Stanton.

Moreover, from the beginning of the Civil War, by escaping to Union lines, blacks forced the fate of slavery onto the national political agenda.

The film grossly exaggerates the possibility that by January 1865 the war might have ended with slavery still intact. The Emancipation Proclamation had already declared more than three million of the four million slaves free, and Louisiana, Maryland, Missouri, Tennessee and West Virginia, exempted in whole or part from the proclamation, had decreed abolition on their own.

Even as the House debated, Sherman’s army was marching into South Carolina, and slaves were sacking plantation homes and seizing land. Slavery died on the ground, not just in the White House and the House of Representatives. That would be a dramatic story for Hollywood.

ERIC FONER
New York, Nov. 23, 2012
The writer, a history professor at Columbia University, won the 2011 Pulitzer Prize for history for “The Fiery Trial: Abraham Lincoln and American Slavery.” 

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

what the fuck is david brooks yapping about - part ??

in this part whatever of what appears to be an infinite-part series, i again examine the latest and greatest david brooks column in the new york times and ask the question we've all been wondering: what the fuck is david brooks yapping about?

i was planning on reading this article when this lead-in caught my eye: Cellphones and texting technology give suitors instantaneous contact, without the stability of guidance from the community.

not to be redundant, but what?

david brooks begins the article thusly: Since April 2007, New York magazine has posted online sex diaries.

AHHHHH! my eyes! my ears! my everything!!!

so i guess the point of the article is how texting is ruining romance because this technology enables us to hunt for an endless array of sexual/romantic partners without the stabilizing force of elk clubs or whatever. i dunno, man, most people i know still meet their mates through school, friends, work, kickball leagues, etc. y'know, communities. his theory that cellphones and texting dissolve obstacles is complete bunk. you're not texting into the ether--you gotta meet the textees (hehe, textees) somewhere! yeah ok, i kind of get it. texting = fragmentation. but what isn't fragmented nowadays? why single out texting? is it any more or less a force than cable tv or google books or twatter or whatever other new medium? why not just blame alexander graham bell for starting us down this path of ruin? or fucking gutenberg for destroying the oral tradition? and why, for chrissake, conjure up the image of david brooks perusing online sex diaries?

[ed note: my badz. link to said article now provided.]

Friday, August 8, 2008

what the fuck is david brooks yapping about - part 5 (?)

in this part 5 (?) of what appears to be an infinite-part series, i again examine the latest and greatest david brooks column in the new york times and ask the question we've all been wondering: what the fuck is david brooks yapping about?

i knew today's david brooks column was going to be awesome as soon as i read the headline: lord of the memes. holy shit guys, TWO references in one pun-LARIOUS title! it also began with my favorite david brooks literary device, the Q&A. who's supposed to be kierkegaard, you daavid brΓΈoks?

anyway, i didn't really read this shit in depth, but here are some choice quotes:

But on or about June 29, 2007, human character changed. That, of course, was the release date of the first iPhone.

(In this era, MySpace is the new leisure suit and an AOL e-mail address is a scarlet letter of techno-shame.)

Maximum status goes to the Gladwellian heroes who occupy the convergence points of the Internet infosystem — Web sites like Pitchfork for music, Gizmodo for gadgets, Bookforum for ideas, etc.

those are NOT WORDS. i know this is his attempt at humor or something, but seriously, who is this guy's intended audience?? is anyone laughing?

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

what the fuck is david brooks yapp--

i started reading today's column for the "newest" platitude plus requisite eyeroll, but brooks stymied me with this opening:

My first thought on the running mate question is that to balance his ticket, Barack Obama should pick a really old white general. Therefore, he should pick Dwight Eisenhower. John McCain, on the other hand, needs to pick someone younger than himself. Therefore, he also should pick Dwight Eisenhower.

hahaha! you can't go wrong with a good "just how old is mccain" joke in my books. so maybe i don't hate george packer for his repeated references to brooks in his otherwise engaging article.

in any case, i stopped reading after that opener bc i just didn't want to ruin a good moment. next time, brooks. next time.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

bulging brides

there are ads for this tv show all over the city - on telephone booths (indeed, they still exist), subway cars, random places where ads shouldn't be, etc. at first i thought it was about pregnant brides, which may have been an interesting concept. how do you design a dress for a woman whose size keeps changing? but no, turns out it's actually about brides who are too fat and have to lose weight for their wedding day. this is literally the premise for an upcoming episode:
Big Portuguese portions are keeping this bride-to-be bulging through the hips and out of her dress.

anyway, someone out there understands my hate affair with david brooks. to wit: The Brooks method is to take a banal, long-existing or only partially true observation, give it a cute name and take credit for it. In other words, he’s a perfect op-ed columnist.

genius.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

A Day Two Dictators Would Die

In our wide-ranging coverage here at Interweb Detritus, the Pakistani political scene ranks almost as highly as bile David Brooks has to spew and references to 80's sitcoms; so, in the spirit of completeness, today--the day that Fidel Castro resigned from a post he didn't even occupy (because a guy whose stock and trade is drawing ejaculate on the faces of Hollywood teenagers reported him dead months ago)--I join the fray and write the political obituary of another dictator, Pervez Musharraf.

I don't have a lot of insight to offer: his cabal of yes-men took a severe blow in yesterday's election, and it looks as though Benazir's PPP will now come to some sort of understanding with the Muslim League and its once-bald/now-resplendent mascot, Nawaz Sharif. A new coalition government will form, and if it can cobble together the two-thirds majority needed to impeach the old Generalissimo, it'll toss him out (provided of course that he pig-headedly resists his political fortunes and sticks around for the ass-beating).

I could speculate what the future holds for a country that has seized onto-- Obamaniacally you could say--"change" as its watchword, only to hale back into office the two previous ruling parties (as some sort of Voltron-esque collaboration): one party, a craven cult of personality, whose fallen leader gave the Taliban succour, and the other, a divisive, provincial (in both senses of the word) joke, whose moronic leader entered a nuclear arms race and garnered Pakistan the title of "world's most dangerous country." I could speculate, but with today's news that the United States has already carried out at least one clandestine, unilateral strike on Pakistan, even I am not willing to follow my dark, cynical heart farther into the abyss.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

what the fuck is david brooks yapping about - part 4

in this part 4 of what appears to be an infinite-part series, i again examine the latest and greatest david brooks column in the new york times and ask the question we've all been wondering: what the fuck is david brooks yapping about?

so...we find ourselves back here again and a lot sooner than i'd anticipated. or wanted, frankly. david brooks definitely has a distinctive voice, one which involves mysterious references and humorless attempts at humor. even the new yorker's shouts & murmurs column elicits more laughs.

i think the point of his most recent op-ed was to illustrate how you can (potentially) use educational levels to explain the democrats' 50-50 split between hillary and obama. i'm not sure if i even believe this thesis, since my very well-educated friends are split between the two. moreover, who can decipher what the underlying message is considering his convoluted words?

he tries to be all cute and wink-wink funny by presenting his column in a q & a format. i have the following questions for him:

1) who is "dr. retail"? am i supposed to get this reference?
2) what is he referring to in the following sentence? in describing obama supporters brooks writes, "They fall for all that zero-carbon footprint, locally grown, community-enhancing Third Place hype. They want cultural signifiers that enrich their lives with meaning." huh? what is "third place"?
3) i think the following sentence describing obama should have CLUNK written next to it: Have you noticed that he’s actually carried into his rallies by a flock of cherubs while the heavens open up with the Hallelujah Chorus? I wonder how he does that.
4) as usual, vast overstatements dominate: High school grads are much less optimistic than college grads. oh yeah? have you met me? my friends?

but! i actually found myself agreeing with brooks on something. i know. i should hang myself in shame and maybe change the name of this series altogether, but how can you not agree with this: "There’s a “Yes We Can” video floating around YouTube in which a bunch of celebrities like Scarlett Johansson and the guy from the Black Eyed Peas are singing the words to an Obama speech in escalating states of righteousness and ecstasy. If that video doesn’t creep out normal working-class voters, then nothing will." although you know he was so proud of knowing who the dude from the black eyed peas was.

anyway, i was going to blog about this real estate article, but suffice to say, how is it that a freelance film maker and his non-profit director wife are able to afford a house in fort greene?

Friday, January 25, 2008

what we're talking about when we're talking about the economy (aka what the eff is david brooks yapping about - part 3)

in this part 3 of what appears to be an infinite-part series, i again examine the latest and greatest david brooks column in the new york times and ask the question we've all been wondering: what the fuck is david brooks yapping about? [Ed note: finally, i came up with a photo to illustrate just how i feel about david brooks.]

i swear i approached today's david brooks column with a somewhat open-minded stance. everyone knows i hate him and that i think he makes no sense...pretty much EVER, but i told myself today: i'm going to take a deep breath before i start silently screaming.

he begins the column by delineating two ways we can talk about the recent and ongoing turmoil in the markets: the greed narrative or the ecology narrative. oooookay. i'm not sure whether he came up with these brilliant names himself, but the hostile nature of the first moniker vs the benign, almost warm & fuzzy image invoked by the second pretty much lets me know which one he prefers.

he gives a scant two paragraphs to the so-called "greed narrative", using inflammatory and over-the-top descriptions like, "absurdly overpaid zillionaires" and "obscene bonuses". apparently all those who express any cynicism or disdain for how the market has been operating of late are sugar high teenagers. don't describe paul krugman that way. please.

then he moves on and devotes thirteen paragraphs on his "ecology narrative", with sweeping generalizations like "Everyone seeks wealth while minimizing risk" and "The U.S. has enjoyed 25 years of strong economic growth". not to mention, apologizing for the recent volatility in the markets with this type of benign and naive explanation:

Most of the time, the complex new instruments diversify risk and serve the public good. But life requires trade-offs, and, as we’re being reminded this week, the innovation process involves a painful adolescence.

When a new instrument enters the market, it takes a while before people understand and institutionalize it. Whether the product is high-yield bonds or mortgage-backed securities, there’s a tendency to get carried away.

In the first stage of this adolescence, investors look around and see everybody else making money off some new instrument. As Nicholas Bloom of Stanford notes: “They assume they are fine because they see everyone else buying it.”

indeed, i think mr. bloom is describing GREED. as in, thinking only about their own gains and not about any of the possible consequences of their actions. if i can withhold my anger and use david brooks' jargon, the so-called "greed narrative" is merely a subset of his genteel "ecology narrative". anyway, brooks' basic stance, surprise, is that the government shouldn't do anything to intervene because that just hampers innovation in the financial markets. and tsk tsk, these guys just got "carried away"! don't reprimand them and don't attempt to change the status quo. following his whole adolescence into maturity metaphor, what type of overzealous adolescent reigns in his/her behavior without some supervision and/or discipline? on that note, i'd like to meet his kids.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

what the fuck is david brooks yapping about - part 2

in this part 2 of what appears to be an infinite-part series, i again examine the latest and greatest david brooks column in the new york times and ask the question we've all been wondering: what the fuck is david brooks yapping about?

so...one of the innumerable unfortunate fallouts of sasha frere-jones's "miscegenation" article in the new yorker is that it encouraged david brooks to put his two cents in. typical david brooks, his two cents arrived about 6 weeks too late. but he'll have you know, he's hip, he's with it.

i can't even muster up the energy to write about his column. as usual, it boggles my mind that he has this incredible forum and he wastes it on nonsensical drivel like this:

But cultural history has pivot moments, and at some point toward the end of the 1970s or the early 1980s, the era of integration gave way to the era of fragmentation. There are now dozens of niche musical genres where there used to be this thing called rock. There are many bands that can fill 5,000-seat theaters, but there are almost no new groups with the broad following or longevity of the Rolling Stones, Springsteen or U2. (emphasis supplied)

It seems that whatever story I cover, people are anxious about fragmentation and longing for cohesion. This is the driving fear behind the inequality and immigration debates, behind worries of polarization and behind the entire Obama candidacy.

oh hey, look at me! i'm david brooks! i'm on pbs! look how nicely my scant knowledge in music and politics dovetails!

anyway, this gawker post does a better job than i could. besides, is there a better tag than "bozos in paradise"? hehe.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

what the fuck is david brooks yapping about

what's with david brooks? how's this guy an expert on anything? i guess i find him mildly entertaining on shields & brooks, but most of the time he seems to be reporting from a vacuum. so he writes this op-ed today in the times about how people in their 20s seem to be less and less inclined to follow the "traditional" march into adulthood. alright, i'm on board. sounds good. then he starts to lose me:

Dating gives way to Facebook and hooking up. Marriage gives way to cohabitation. Church attendance gives way to spiritual longing. Newspaper reading gives way to blogging. (In 1970, 49 percent of adults in their 20s read a daily paper; now it’s at 21 percent.)

what the hell is he talking about? i understand that some of this is hyperbole, but could this column be any more plodding? who is his audience? oh man, it gets even weirder!

This has fundamentally scrambled the courtship rituals and decreased the pressure to get married. Educated women can get many of the things they want (income, status, identity) without marriage, while they find it harder (or, if they’re working-class, next to impossible) to find a suitably accomplished mate.

it's not news, it's not opinion, it's not fact...i don't know what that is. and the best yet:

Rather, what we’re seeing is the creation of a new life phase, just as adolescence came into being a century ago. It’s a phase in which some social institutions flourish — knitting circles, Teach for America — while others — churches, political parties — have trouble establishing ties.

knitting circles?! can i get paid to write this shit? please? and to conclude...

And as the new generational structure solidifies, social and economic entrepreneurs will create new rites and institutions. Someday people will look back and wonder at the vast social changes wrought by the emerging social group that saw their situations first captured by “Friends” and later by “Knocked Up.”

come back, timesselect! if i had submitted something like this in college, nay, middle school, i think it would've been returned to me with "THESIS?" in giant red letters along the front.

anyway, this reminds me. i was reading some article entitled, "why is bob herbert boring?" while chuckling to myself bc, let's face it, he is! the sad part is that he is so relevant and almost always right, yet i never feel compelled to read his artcles. and sure enough, the day after i giggled through that column, i saw this.